2015 thus far.

2015- it's going to be a big...no...huge year for us (my husband and I). InshaaAllah we're expecting this little one to come out in a couple of months. I pray that it will be a smooth birthing experience for me and the baby. I have to admit, I was a wreck yesterday (still am today). I couldn't stop thinking about the day and I'm so afraid that I'll mess everything up. I know I'm supposed to be positive and all that but hey this is my first time and of course I'm going to be all anxious and scared. There's just so much to do and prepare and I haven't done all of it. 

My hands are starting to swell. The left hand is only swelling but the right hand is swelling and in pain. AJ has been massaging it day and night for the past couple of days but it is still painful. I have been in an awful mood and I feel really bad because he has to take it. Yesterday I couldn't stop crying  on his shoulders because I felt so guilty. He was still so nice to me even though I wasn't. He gave me space but at the same time he didn't leave me alone. I don't know what I did to deserve someone like him. If you are reading this, please know that I love you and I do appreciate all the things you've done for me. I'm sorry if I haven't been a good wife lately.

The third trimester has not been easy. I get tired easily but I can't really sleep at night (because of my swelling hands) and also because my tummy is getting bigger. It's harder to find a comfortable position. I am glad I went to the Hypnobirthing class and learned about the right way to sleep on my left side. And because I've been doing it since my second trimester, it is not so hard to get used to it. But I do still wake up in the middle of the night when my left arm starts to feel numb.

I still haven't decided on which doctor I'm going to choose. So far I have seen 3 doctors and I only like one. The problem is, the one I like is very expensive, but is willing to listen to what I want (and need) for my birthing experience. 

Doctor A=

Pros

willing to listen, willing to wait for the baby to come naturally, explains things very well. The birthing suite is awesome. Awesome awesome birthing facility. 

Cons

Quite expensive. A normal birth will cost about 6k-10k. An emergency c-section can go up to 13k, The appointments are on first come first serve basis (sometimes you wait for 4 hours only to be told to go home because the doctor is attending a birthing mother).

Oh, and he is a male chinese doctor (I am not concerned about this but AJ is, so...yeah).

Doctor B=

Pros

Been seeing her since we found out that we are pregnant. Doesn't talk about c-section (Yay). However, talked about inducing the day before the due date (Noooo). A female muslim doctor which is a Yay for AJ.

Cons

Their facilities are quite old. Not sure if they can cater to emergency cases or if I will have to be transferred to a hospital. Will cost us around 3k for a normal birth.

Doctor C=

Pros

An experienced muslim female doctor. The hospital is near. The appointments are on time and the system is quite organised. Provides good information and tells things as it is, Will cost us around 3k for a normal birth BUT 10k for emergency c-section.

Cons

The doctor is not really willing to listen to what we want. She told us that I will have to be induced two weeks before my due date (as soon as the baby is mature enough) (A BIG NO!). 

Finally

Government hospital(s)

A bigger chance to birth the baby naturally but probably still have to be induced one day before the due date. Not so sure about the facilities. No guarantee that I will get the same doctor.

We're planning to see two more doctors- hopefully one of them will suit our needs.

Wish us luck!